At Atchuvely, during the first week of November, some L.T.T.E. members threw grenades at the I.P.K.F. and escaped through a Proctor Balasingam’s house. Two soldiers were killed. Soldiers entered Proctor Balasingam’s house and called out the Proctor, his wife and another person, who were helpless parties in the matter. Subsequently all three were shot dead.
—From A Broken Palmyra (Chapter 2.3 Scenes from the October 1987 War)

There were birches along the stream and it was not big, but narrow, clear and fast, with pools where it had cut under the roots of the birches. At the Hotel in Triberg the proprietor had a fine season. It was very pleasant and we were all great friends. The next year came the inflation and the money he had made the year before was not enough to buy supplies to open the hotel and he hanged himself.
—Ernest Hemingway, from The Snows of Kilimanjaro

Megatron: [surprised] Prime.
Optimus Prime: One shall stand, one shall fall.
Megatron: Why throw away your life so recklessly?
Optimus Prime: That’s a question you should ask YOURSELF, Megatron.
—From the greatest scene in cinematic history. I can’t wait for the 20th Aniversary DVD.

You used my toothbrush, you owe me a new one. Your an idiot.
Email from my brother

Mrs. Smith, ladies and gentlemen of the press corps, Mr. President and first lady, my name is Stephen Colbert and it’s my privilege tonight to celebrate our president. He’s not so different, he and I. We get it. We’re not brain backs on the nerd patrol. We’re not members of the fact (police). We go straight from the gut, right sir? That’s where the truth lies, right down here in the gut. Do you know you have more nerve endings in your gut than you have in your head? You can look it up….I know some of you are going to say I did look it up, and that’s not true. That’s because you looked it up in a book. Next time look it up in your gut. I did. My gut tells me that’s how our nervous system works.

Frank Costanza: Many Christmases ago, I went to buy a doll for my son. I reached for the last one they had—but so did another man. As I rained blows upon him, I realized there had to be another way.
Kramer: What happened to the doll?
Frank: It was destroyed. But out of that, a new holiday was born : A Festivus for the rest of us!

I have always loved Cavafy ’s “Ithaca ” how, in the poem, the traveller comes to understand that he will never reach Ithaca and this does not matter. The journey is all. The horror is all. Getting off the boat or plane and saying here are my belongings and thank you for taking me in, this is almost all.
On War by Indran Amirthanayagam

Lisa: I’ve got a weekend job helping the poor and I’m only eight.
Homer: That’s not a job, it’s a waste of time. What can poor people pay you? Nothing! What satisfaction you get from helping them? None! Who wants to help poor people anyway? Nobody!

“Oh, it’s lovely to see you!” Franny said as the cab moved off. “I’ve missed you.” The words were no sooner out than she realized that she didn’t mean them at all. Again with guilt, she took Lane’s hand and tightly, warmly laced fingers with him.
—J. D. Salinger from Franny.

There were birches along the stream and it was not big, but narrow, clear and fast, with pools where it had cut under the roots of the birches. At the Hotel in Triberg the proprietor had a fine season. It was very pleasant and we were all great friends. The next year came the inflation and the money he had made the year before was not enough to buy supplies to open the hotel and he hanged himself. — Ernest Hemingway, from The Snows of Kilimanjaro

They shot the six cabinet ministers at half-past six in the morning against the wall of a hospital. There were pools of water in the courtyard. There were dead leaves on the paving of the courtyard. It rained hard. All the shutters of the hospital were nailed shut. One of the ministers was sick with typhoid. Two soldiers carried him downstairs and out into the rain. They tried to hold him up against the wall but he sat down in a puddle of water. The other five stood very quietly against the wall. Finally the officer told the soldiers it was no good trying to make him stand up. When they fired the first volley he was sitting down in the water with his head on his knees.
—Ernest Hemingway from In Our Time.

Marge: Can we get rid of this Ayatollah tee shirt? Kohmehni died years ago.
Homer: But Marge, it works on any Ayatollah. Ayatollah Nakhbadeh, Ayatollah Zahedi … Even as we speak, Ayatollah Razmara and his cadre of fanatics are consolidating their power!

You don’t slap a man. Ok. I mean, even when slapping was fashionable, ya know, they did it in Paris, some guy would come up: “I challenge you to a duel.” They would have a gunfight after that—somebody had to go!
Charlie Murphy on The Chappelle Show

As soon as we lose the moral basis, we cease to be religious. There is no such thing as religion over-riding morality. Man, for instance, cannot be untruthful, cruel or incontinent and claim to have God on his side.
—Gandhi

But most of all, above everything else, who in the Bible besides Jesus knew—knew—that we’re carrying the Kingdom of Heaven around with us, inside, where we’re all too goddam stupid and sentimental and unimaginative to look? You have to be a son of God to know that kind of stuff.
—J.D. Salinger from Zooey

In the style of a traditional Iranian mother, she would pretend, for five days, that I did not exist; thaw on the sixth; and on the seventh have forgotten the episode entirely, convinced that my rude friends, who didn’t even say Salam to her when they came over, were responsible for ruining my manners.
Azadeh Moaveni from Lipstick Jihad

George Costanza: Ah you have no idea of the magnitude of this thing. If she is allowed to infiltrate this world, then George Costanza as you know him, Ceases to Exist! You see, right now, I have Relationship George, but there is also Independent George. That’s the George you know, the George you grew up with—Movie George, Coffee shop George, Liar George, Bawdy George.
Jerry Sienfeld: I, I love that George.
George: Me Too! And he’s Dying Jerry! If Relationship George walks through this door, he will Kill Independent George! A George, divided against itself, Cannot Stand!

Usurpers always bring about or select troublous times to get passed, under cover of the public terror, destructive laws, which the people would never adopt in cold blood. The moment chosen is one of the surest means of distinguishing the work of the legislator from that of the tyrant.
Jean-Jaque Rousseau from The Social Contract

You know, back when Kennedy was smoking reefers in the White House, if you were a black man and you got taken in for marijuana, they came down on you so hard you’d wish you’d be caught killing another black.
Hassan Abdolrahman, from an interview in the book In The Rose Garden of the Martyrs

If the radiance of a thousand suns
Were to burst at once into the sky
That would be like the splendor of the Mighty one…
I am become Death,
The shatterer of Worlds.
Baghavad-Gita

War does not determine who is right – only who is left.
Bertrand Russell

As soon as we lose the moral basis, we cease to be religious. There is no such thing as religion over-riding morality. Man, for instance, cannot be untruthful, cruel or incontinent and claim to have God on his side.
—Mahatma Gandhi

Gene Frenkle: Can I just say one thing?
Bruce Dickinson: Say it, baby. Say it.
Gene: I’m standing here, staring at Bruce Dickinson!
Bruce: The cock of the walk, baby!
Gene: And if Bruce Dickinson wants more cowbell, we should probably give him more cowbell!
Bruce: Say it, baby!
Gene: And, Bobby, you are right – I am being selfish. But the last time I checked, we don’t have a whole lot of songs that feature the cowbell.
Bruce: I gotta have more cowbell, baby!

And this will be the day, this will be the day when all of God’s children will be able to sing with new meaning, “My country ‘tis of thee, sweet land of liberty, of thee I sing. Land where my fathers died, land of the Pilgrim’s pride, from every mountainside, let freedom ring!” And if America is to be a great nation, this must become true.
Martin Luther King, Jr

Two horrific looking Indian ladies with matching pink boots and Louis Vuitton purses accost me on the bus.
Lady 1: Is that an X-Box?
Ram: No, it’s a GameBoy.
Lady 1: Oh, my nephew has that but he plays it on his TV. All kids like these games.
Ram: I guess so.
Lady 1: How old are you? 15?
Ram: 24
Lady 2: You don’t look 24.
Ram: Yeah.

→ → →